Do y’all remember that game you would play when you were a kid….

“Never would I ever…”

You would make up some funny one liner, or a very serious, not even a hint of a joke, never would you ever statement.

But either way, it would always include a circle of you and your friends all sharing your biggest never ever ever statements.

That game is all fun and stuff when you’re little but I feel like the second that you grow up, that game becomes a chess game for God.

Never would you ever not go to college….lets change these events….check. 
Never would you ever meet the love of your life on a first date….ohh game changer….check.
Never would you ever have babies while you are a baby…..check, check, and maybe a few more checks on that one. 
Never would you ever home school (because those people are just plain crazy)…..oh she’s not liking this one, check, hey you can run and scream and hide and kick and cry and quit, but CHECK CHECK CHECK.

Yeah, I mean…I am not mocking the Lord…..but….sometimes that is exactly how it feels.

I know His ways are always better than mine and I can look back on each one of those check marks knowing that they have been some of my greatest treasures in life. They have been pieces of my story that I would never change. Pieces of my heart that have been sewn together through the never would I ever game.

But, still.


Do you ever realize that usually every single time you say never ever ever God says, yes, yes, yes. He enjoys working in your life in the grey area. He’s not black and white. He doesn’t fit into this perfect mold that we shape Him into…and thank GOD for that. If He had worked things the way I wanted Him to…sure life would be cozy, life maybe would even be good, but I wouldn’t be me and it wouldn’t be this. I wouldn’t be stretched and grown and BLESSED.

I remind myself daily that life isn’t designed to be cozy. Some of my best work comes amidst the struggle and the chaos. Because that isn’t my work. I can’t claim any of it. It’s His.

The young bride who was selfish and entitled and lazy and disrespectful….yeah, God used that, he changed that, and by His grace that marriage is still here and even more beautiful than day one.

The mom who was a baby herself, barely having learned how to cook and clean and even care for herself outside of her parents, birthing not one but two babes. Then struggling to stay home and keep her head above water all the while keeping two little humans alive. Yeah, that wasn’t her, He was weaving His grace and strength through that season day in and day out. And by His grace, those two tiny humans multiplied to four and she has kept them all alive.

The homeschooling mama who is kicking and screaming and crying and quitting her way through teaching her babes, well, she’s still here, and He is weaving that grace and strength with the freaking big yarn. Because y’all this story is still being told, this story is hard, but His grace is good.

But don’t you see?

I couldn’t do a thing without His grace, and His strength.

And I am not really sure I would even want to try!

The stories and the seasons may be hard, but they are always sweet. There may be struggles and pain but amidst that there is goodness and joy. Through the storm we see the beauty, and that makes it worth it over and over again.

Now instead of sitting around a circle of friends spouting off never would I ever scenarios, I think I would rather play the game of, never did I ever think. Followed up with a…but GOD. That game will check your heart right at the door.

Every, single, time.


I was driving down the freeway last week and my phone rang. I don’t know about y’all but usually when my phone rings I silence it and text the person back to see what they needed or wanted to talk about. I’m not really a phone person, while I have gotten much better over the years, and I do have my select circle that I can talk to for hours now, outside of that circle, everything in my body literally freezes or sweats when my phone rings.

And honestly that isn’t usually because I don’t want to talk to the person, it’s usually because when I answer the phone it goes something like this.

I’m hungry, thirsty, have to pee, he wont turn the ceiling fan on…the refrigerator is making a strange noise, there’s a fly that’s by my left foot, my shorts wont button, he hit, she blinked, he breathed, or he WONT STOP LOOKING AT ME!

You know…life seriously implodes for a mama the second you answer the phone.

Like it’s an unwritten law that kids just know has to be upheld the second that mom presses that little green button.

But, this day was different.

I was driving home from dropping three of the four kids off and number four was actually able to stay home with Dad, so my car was almost scary silent. Because of this crazy and almost scary silence the sound of someone’s voice at that particular moment in time seemed comforting. Besides, I didn’t know the number, and it was local. So I figured that meant one of two things. There was a bill that needed to be paid or a doctor wanted us to schedule an appointment. Both easy and pain free conversations, well sort of?!

I answered the phone and to my surprise it was someone asking about this space.

Yeah, it seems as though they used some serious elbow grease and Thieves cleaner and scrubbed off the insane amount of dust and cobwebs that covered this place. They didn’t just ask about this space casually this person went to great lengths and began asking what my plans were for it.


I hadn’t even thought about this place in months. I mean I posted a couple months back about how I was going to do better and be here and present more often, but we all know what happened after that, more dust, and more cobwebs. It seemed strange that someone would even care to know anything about this place, let alone my plans for it. But, the even crazier thing is, that after that phone call this space has been brought up more times than I can even count.

Blogging was an outlet for me.

It was a place where I could share God’s promptings and my journey and my thoughts out in the real world for all to see, or all not to, but that wasn’t really the point. The point was, when my fingers were tapping away at the keys I got a lot out. I worked through a lot that was going on inside of me and I saw God show up in a completely different way.

And that was good.

I loved it. And I felt as though it was something I was supposed to do, and something God wanted me to do. But as per usual, whenever something good happens to you attacks happen simultaneously. For the first time in my adult life in this place, I let comparison steal that joy. I saw this place and I compared it to others, and I told myself the lie that my time was better spent doing something else. Something more productive and benefiting to those around me.

But the thing is, I started this place for the very reasons I shared above. To let God work through me and my words and not really caring who read it and when. In fact whenever I would talk to someone and they would mention this blog and how this post or that post hit home with them I was shocked. I honestly didn’t think anyone read it. I honestly just used it as an online journal and the second that I changed that and looked at it in a different light that was when the joy was gone.

So, when that phone rang, in my car, at the most convenient of times, a conversation with the most challenging of questions began, questions I had never even thought about before, which in turn encouraged me to go back to that place of writing for the love of it.

And so here I am.

I don’t know where this space is going.

I don’t have any big goals or dreams or aspirations.

But I do know that I love to write.

I love to see God work through my fingertips and write the most beautiful testimonies ever.

I love to share stories of my babies and husband in a place that they will never ever go away.

I love to write creatively or personally about the hard times and the good times.

I love to lose myself in my writing only to read it back and say wow God, you are good.

I love to encourage.

And I love to inspire.

So I guess the call led me to rediscover my calling….in the most strangest of ways.


It’s really true how you don’t miss something until its gone, right?

I took a break from this space because I just felt so overwhelmed, but then this morning as I was sitting and eating my toast I was reminded of this place. This post came to mind and as I sat and read through it, I was reminded how this place served as a creative outlet for me for so long.

My days are now filled with homeschooling my four babes while trying to juggle working from home and I felt busy and unprepared at the time and parts of me that all those things demanded. So I let this place slip away.

It’s kind of what we do as women, isn’t it?

When life is demanding and we are juggling lots of different plates, the one that’s easiest to set down is our own. The one that wont be noticed if it quietly gets put away. We do this because we know that life has to keep going, the plates have to continue to juggle, and we can’t let the plates that hold our home, faith, husband, children, school, and work fall and break, because those don’t juggle in anyone’s hands but our own.

But our plate, the one no one sees, the one that’s in the background, the one that is quietly filled in the wee hours of morning or late into the night, that plate is the safest to let fall. That plate doesn’t have anyone on it but you.

But you know what I’ve learned?

I have learned that all the other plates turn into a blur of mess and crazy when we don’t let our own in the mix too.

I have kind of let myself slip away this past year. My own personal wellness in mind, body, and spirit. And I thought it was good. I thought it was right. I thought it had to happen. But you know what, it didn’t.

And it shouldn’t.

Because nothing is good and right if I am not. If my heart isn’t filled with His word, if my mind isn’t stimulated by what drives me, if my fingers aren’t having words spilling out of them, or my muscles aren’t aching from workouts, I am not my best self. In fact I wont ever be my best self if I am not treating myself as though I am worth it.

So today, I am taking a stand. I am digging in, I am picking up my plate and I am adding it back into the mix. I am letting my fingers hit the keys, putting the emails on hold, soaking a little bit longer in the tub, and claiming myself worth it.

Because if my plate isn’t full of all the good things that feed my soul, theirs wont be either.

So hello old friend, thank you for always saving a space for me, no matter how long I put you away.


Oh my dears….it’s been SO long since we have chatted. How are you all!?

I hope this post finds you all well, but I just HAD to share with you!

We were given the opportunity to try a pair of Freshly Picked mocs and I must say, I was ecstatic!!! My sweet little babes have been deprived in the mocs department and I have always wanted to try these beauties out so I was just so thankful that we were given this opportunity!

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I fell in love with this company back when I saw Susan on Shark Tank. I mean who can’t have love for this mama who worked hard and made her dream and passion a reality…!! Absolutely amazing!!

So when we got our package at the door, I ripped it open and immediately put them on baby boys feet. With him being number four, shoes need to be able to be slipped on fast, and stay on. And I could already tell I was going to be completely smitten by these! They slipped right on his chubby little feet and he had zero complaints. They are seriously adorable and go with anything. I can’t even begin to tell y’all how much we love these sweet shoes. Even the grown kids are asking for a pair…good thing they have their next step, hard sole mocs now!!! Just gotta get those in some bigger big boy sizes;)

I am absolutely so in love with these sweet shoes and am beyond excited to share with one of you all! Hop on over to my Instagram feed to enter the giveaway to win a pair for your sweet babe!!!

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Yesterday afternoon I stole the boys away and we went to the mall. I don’t even know if my kids really know what a mall is because we never go, Target what!?! 

So of course their overstimulated eyes were like glowing as they oohed and awed at every single store. At first it was cute but then became terrifying because I kept thinking I was going to have to buy all the dishes in Anthro because, well, boys. But after that catastrophe was avoided I took a step back and just watched them be, kids.

Life is so funny, because kids grow


You spend a few years just trying to keep them alive and then they are all legs and get that stinky kid smell and you sit back and wonder how the heck you got there.

So as we ran through the mall, literally. We walked past build a bear. Mind you, my kids don’t even know what build a bear is because I hate stuffed animals, I feel like they waste money and space and I don’t even think twice when I pile them into the Goodwill bag. But I looked in, and then I looked at my boys. MY BOYS. My grown, tall, smart, stinky, loving BOYS and knew that we needed to do this. So without a second thought I walked them in and let them pick out their favorite, clearance, stuffed animal and we went through the process.

I think they were so shocked that they were actually doing it they were quiet and just taking it all in, but then I saw the cool factor fade away and they were kids. Cute, innocent, little kids who were over the moon excited. They laughed and smiled and just genuinely were so happy that I couldn’t help but let my heart melt into a puddle on the ground.

They must have thanked me a hundred times as they beamed with pride and excitement carrying those little cardboard boxes, but I was secretly thanking them inside. Thanking them for being kids still, innocent little boys who still appreciate something like that. Who still truly love to be with me, and thank me, and do kid things like this, because when they don’t want to anymore I think I will be a giant mess of a mess who doesn’t know what to do with herself.

These boys man. They are something else. They drive me crazy and fill me with so much love and pride that I don’t even know what to think.

But one thing I do know, the unexpected surprises, those are the best ever to give. Way better than ever receiving. And yesterday, as simple and normal as it was, is a day I will tuck away for a very long time.


About four months ago I made the decision to fully pursue the business side of Young Living Essential Oils. I know, I know, who isn’t these days right?

But after using the product, loving the product, and having our lives changed by the product I couldn’t help but want to share.

I am a stay at home mama. A homeschooling stay at home mama. And so to me, this opportunity seemed perfect. Something I could do during naptime, or in the evenings when they were asleep, and schedule a couple classes a month, all the while still being at home and being present, win/win, right? Once I began focusing on how to do this business I knew I wanted to create a team, a unified community that would allow people to feel welcomed and informed and educated in how to better their families lives naturally. So with the help of two beautiful friends, we did just that. When I say friends, I feel like that doesn’t even cut it. These girls are girls I dream with, girls who dream with me, and encourage and love on me. It’s a pretty fantastic partnership and friendship, that’s for sure. So the three of us worked our tails off, and through much prayer, love, and work, launched Joy Drop Culture.

Joy drop culture is a community of people who are on a mission to better their health and wellness naturally, through essential oils. But not only that friends, its a place to feel encouraged in all aspects of life. Its a wonderful community of friends and like minded people. I couldn’t have made everything work out better if I tried. Our vision and our dream is playing out right in front of my eyes, its beautiful and amazing.

But like anything, when things begin to unfold in front of you, you can lose sight on the thing that matters most, and that is something I never want to allow myself to do. I never want to lose sight of the one person who makes all things possible. Jesus must be at the forefront of everything we do, or it will all fall apart, and I know that.

I am a visionary, I see the bigger picture, I envision what I want and I go for it, and friends that is what I want in this business, I will go to the top, but it wont be easy. And being a person who has the patience of a squirrel I tend to forget that.

But He doesn’t.

During my quiet time this morning, that unfortunately hasn’t been happening as much as it should be, I flipped right to 1 Corinthians 4:11-13

But each should be careful how he builds. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. If any man builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood hay or straw, his work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light.

That was exactly what I needed to hear, at the exact moment I needed to hear it. I cannot build the foundation of this business, or my family, or my life, on anything else but Jesus Christ. His foundation is the only foundation that is solid and that will stand the test of time. No matter what I try and do on my own it will crumble. And when it crumbles I will only be saved through the flames. I must allow His hands to be at the center of what I am doing. I must be on my knees asking and seeking guidance and looking at my organization as a blessing from Him. These people were brought into my life for a reason. How can I serve them? What can I do to help them better themselves and their families? How can I shepherd and lead and guide them if Jesus isn’t at the center of this business?

Every single step I take needs to be behind Him. I can’t sprint to the finish line, no matter how badly I want to, if He hasn’t led me there yet. I need to allow that foundation to be built and allow Him to make it firm and steady and secure, and then, then this business will be bigger than I could ever ask or imagine. And then I will be able to look and exclaim, His ways are always better than my own. Because aren’t they?

If you are on my team, know that you are constantly being prayed over. You are loved and I feel so blessed to be on this journey with you. There is a reason you are where you are, and I will prayerfully be helping you lead a life of wellness, purpose, and abundance, because Lord willing, that is the best kind of life!!

If you aren’t on my team, I would love to have you, this whole journey has been such an amazing and fun ride, and it’s nowhere close to being finished:)

We began our homeschool year last week.

It is so crazy to me the journey that the Lord can take us on. Just last year as I was prepping the boys and rushing them out the door I was so thankful to have the days to myself, to have someone else in charge of their learning, and to just be able to do my own thing for a few hours during the day.

While none of those thoughts have really changed…I still love my alone time and crave it, I still think that I need to be able to do my own thing, I have began to see the change in my heart about me wanting to be the one in charge of their learning. Seeing their eyes opened to new things, allowing them to explore what interests them, and helping to instill a true love for learning, that is now so exciting to me.


Since beginning this year I am noticing such a huge change in our family dynamic. What was once rushed hurried and chaotic is now less stressful, relaxed, and slow. I see the changes in just their everyday actions, my older son who tends to be more anxious is now more at ease in the slowness of our days, my other son who is more inquisitive is excited to learn more and spend less and less time behind a screen. My boys used to spend most of their days fighting and arguing and being truly hurtful to one another, now they are spending their days laughing and playing and really building that stronger relationship that I always longed they had.

I can say all of this is because I decided to make that change, or I can be honest and say that all of this is the fruition of years of prayers. Years of tears and hard work and anguish over how to better their education. How to help them where the school couldn’t. And years of being on my knees asking the Lord to help but still running into the same dead end. What seemed like a dead end at the time, was now just a stepping stone to where we are now. Mainly because my heart didn’t change overnight. It wasn’t some shift that just clicked into gear, it was a slow change and one that I went through kicking, screaming, and clawing all the while telling the Lord that he was crazy and I knew better. But once I allowed that shift, and I really needed that shift I began to allow the Lord to make my heart ready for it, and then the prayers started to be answered.

I think that’s the way most things work. As stubborn hard hearted people we need to need the change to really allow God to work. But God, thankfully doesn’t give up on that, He doesn’t see our stubbornness and walk away, no, He sees that stubbornness and gently pushes and guides us into the direction we need to go, the direction that is best for us, and the direction He ultimately always had planned for us.


You see, His ways are greater than ours, they are bigger and better than we could ever ask or imagine. We just have to get out of our own way and allow Him to work, because I can guarantee you that in hindsight it will always be better then what you could have ever accomplished on your own.

I have been kind of struggling lately with all the things of this world. Friends, my faith is secure, I know who made me , who loves me, and where I am going, but I am human and I have good old (or maybe bad old) human thoughts.

I think it may be partially from my rebirth on Facebook. You see and are bombarded with so much life stuff at such a high rate in such a small amount of time, that if one doesn’t have a firm foundation I can only imagine you would get quickly swayed one way or another. It’s a constant battle with me at least, to try and scroll real fast when I see something controversial with angry heated comments, or to push aside a comment that was directed towards me that was anything but kind.

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In the past few years the Lord has been working some serious stuff in my heart. I was such a righteous Christian just a few years ago. Like a go and get Chick-Fila to make a statement kind of Christian.

Yes I did that.

Yes I have some serious head shaking that happens when I think of it.

Not because of what they believed. Because I do believe the Bible is the true inspired word of God. A book I should live by and believe in with my whole heart.

But because of the statement I was trying to make.

When we do things with the motive to make a statement, is that love? When we want our views and words to be heard and seen and believed, is that love?

Friends in the true inspired word of God He states this…

So whatever you believe about these things keep them between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. Romans 15:22

So back to that Facebook thing. How much of what we post is lifting our own agenda, and how much of what we post is out of love?

I have been so guilty of getting sucked into that silly share button. You know that one that just begs you to push it. It’s like you read something that hits some crazy emotion inside of you and that share button just looks at you and says…me, me, push me, they just have to read this.

Or is that just me?

I’ll read something and say yes, yes, yes!

And think (or not think) okay they need to hear this. Whether it be about politics, or vaccines, or our food wars. But if I am not hitting share out of love, then what am I really doing?

Am I condemning others and their beliefs? Or trying to lift myself up? Or do I push share with a certain person in mind? If the answer to those questions is yes, then I am failing those around me and even more so I am failing at loving others like myself.

This world has so much yuck in it.

So much hate, so much evil, so much of everything but love that I don’t even need to contribute more to it.

So hear me on this, I am here to try my hardest to spread love. In a world full of hate I pray that His little light shines bright in my every corner of the internet.

Can it in your’s too?


Oh goodness gracious it is so crazy lately. Schools out for….ever now;) well not really but choosing to bring all four of my kids home and educate them here creates a complete change in our schedule. One I am still not used to, but also one that I am so excited about and cannot wait to get started.

Have y’all heard of Classical Conversations?

If you haven’t, and are a homeschooling family, take a peek around that webpage..its an awesome curriculum and one that I am so blessed to be a part of!!

If you didn’t notice, our team, Joy Drop Culture, is growing like crazy. Our website launched at the beginning of the month and we have had a pretty full calendar of classes and business launches and I am incredibly blessed by this new venture.

It’s funny how my word for the year was slow and it has felt anything but that. But then when I take a step back I see God refining me in the busy. Even though its busy, he is teaching me how to carve out my moments of slow. How to see the good in all the crazy, because friends, its really, really, good.

I am sorry its been so long, but my heart knows that I need to let go of certain things, again the gift of the Lord refining me, and I am okay with that. Follow along on our team site, and follow along on facebook. And if you want to join in on this amazing oily journey, I would love to have ya! Shoot me an email, we can chat about all the exciting goodness that is to come!


I wrote a brief caption about this last night on my Instagram but I can’t help but speak on it a little more here.

Comparison is something I have struggled with for a very long time. It’s so easy to get caught up in what everyone else is doing and forget about what you have, isn’t it?

I spent the last week trying to figure out why my eye was twitching. It wouldn’t stop, in fact it bothered me so much I found myself praying for it to stop, but I didn’t know why it was doing it. I wasn’t stressed, I hadn’t had a particularly hard week, lots of fun and exciting things were happening.

I felt happy.

But it just wouldn’t stop.

Finally on Friday night right before our essential oils 101 class I found myself smelling the aroma of the oil blend release. I was particularly drawn to it and just kept inhaling it. I looked over at my friend and mentioned how my head almost felt lighter not like I was going to pass out or anything but almost as if I was floating, I kept saying how I had never felt something like that.


Then out of nowhere in the middle of a normal conversation the tears fell. I tried to stop them, and they weren’t pouring out by any means, but they fell. And I felt even lighter. Like a release, like the oil blend had done exactly what it was intended to do.

I looked at my sweet friend in amazement saying how I had no idea what I was being released from. It was the most bizarre situation I had ever been in. I felt better from something that I didn’t even know was bothering me.

The night went on, the next day went on, I praised the oil and the Lord for doing a work in me, but I didn’t know what the work was.

Then Saturday evening came.

We sat through church and the entire night we were listening to the pastor speak about comparison.


The thief of joy.

A never ending battle.

A no win game.



Rotting to the soul.


Near impossible to overcome without the Lord.

And it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Everything I had touched lately I was comparing to others.

My children, my marriage, my home, myself, my blog, my social media outlets, the way I spent my days, and on and on and on.

Goodness gracious I was eating myself alive with comparison.

But goodness gracious my Lord is mighty to save.

Do not fear, do not be anxious, I will never leave you, or forsake you.

He revealed my need to me, in a gentle and slow way. In the way He knew I would respond and take recognition to.

The twitching, the release, the church service, my heart.

It was all how He planned, all how He wanted, and all that I needed.

Comparison is ugly.

It will rot your bones, make your heart a dark place even before you know its there, and it is almost impossible to overcome alone.

But God.

God is good.

God loves you and wants you to overcome it.


Look at all you have friends, look at it, take inventory and be thankful for all He has given you. Then look at your friend or your neighbor or the girl on your social media channel and thank the Lord for the work He has done in them, for all he has given them, for all He will give them.

And release it.

God is good, all of the time.