It’s really true how you don’t miss something until its gone, right?
I took a break from this space because I just felt so overwhelmed, but then this morning as I was sitting and eating my toast I was reminded of this place. This post came to mind and as I sat and read through it, I was reminded how this place served as a creative outlet for me for so long.
My days are now filled with homeschooling my four babes while trying to juggle working from home and I felt busy and unprepared at the time and parts of me that all those things demanded. So I let this place slip away.
It’s kind of what we do as women, isn’t it?
When life is demanding and we are juggling lots of different plates, the one that’s easiest to set down is our own. The one that wont be noticed if it quietly gets put away. We do this because we know that life has to keep going, the plates have to continue to juggle, and we can’t let the plates that hold our home, faith, husband, children, school, and work fall and break, because those don’t juggle in anyone’s hands but our own.
But our plate, the one no one sees, the one that’s in the background, the one that is quietly filled in the wee hours of morning or late into the night, that plate is the safest to let fall. That plate doesn’t have anyone on it but you.
But you know what I’ve learned?
I have learned that all the other plates turn into a blur of mess and crazy when we don’t let our own in the mix too.
I have kind of let myself slip away this past year. My own personal wellness in mind, body, and spirit. And I thought it was good. I thought it was right. I thought it had to happen. But you know what, it didn’t.
And it shouldn’t.
Because nothing is good and right if I am not. If my heart isn’t filled with His word, if my mind isn’t stimulated by what drives me, if my fingers aren’t having words spilling out of them, or my muscles aren’t aching from workouts, I am not my best self. In fact I wont ever be my best self if I am not treating myself as though I am worth it.
So today, I am taking a stand. I am digging in, I am picking up my plate and I am adding it back into the mix. I am letting my fingers hit the keys, putting the emails on hold, soaking a little bit longer in the tub, and claiming myself worth it.
Because if my plate isn’t full of all the good things that feed my soul, theirs wont be either.
So hello old friend, thank you for always saving a space for me, no matter how long I put you away.